Wacky Writing Wednesday

I’ve been busy this week, so busy that I have had not a second to write for Muse. I am convinced my muse is on vacation in the Cayman Islands somewhere, because I feel the block. I hope to join my Muse soon, maybe share a drink?

What has kept me so busy?:

Summer Camp Fund!! 

My son’s Summer Camp Fundraiser for one.  I’ve been helping William promote his Fanpage The Camp Experience and building a website. I’ve been Tweeting and sharing, helping to get him sponsorships to get to Camp Amy Molson this summer.  WOW!  So much positive feedback, and we are so blessed with the support and sponsorships we have received so far.

In addition, I am offering free Doreen Virtue Angel Oracle Card readings straight into you inbox (for a week)  for any donation of $5.00 or more, and for a $25.00 donation you can choose between a free dream interpretation OR Oracle Card readings for a whole month! (excluding weekends).

YES!! The fabulous Christiana Kanaki, from Under A Sacred Tree, is donating all her proceeds from her Etsy shop this week to help fund my son’s camp experiences. You can find Christiana here or here.

For more on my son’s experience and how to give go to:  The Camp Experience, and click on Our Story.

Dream Interpretations:

I have 2 dream interpretations in my inbox. Although 1 is short, it seems to hold the key to my client’s next step into her journey.  So I want to take the time I need to focus on her dream.   All the dreams I receive are so amazing.  They all tell such a different story, yet, it remains, that these stories are truly a mirror of what is going on in our waking lives.

Writing Prompt!

Jennifer Shelton from FemCentral is hosting a writing prompt which is totally igniting my passion for writing, the thing is, this writing prompt is different (for me) than the ones she has hosted previously, and I am letting my imagination run wild.  I am almost done my first draft, however, I feel the need to tweak, pinch, and make it better.. It is due at midnight tonight.. I got to get rocking on the editing. WOO!

Giving a different perspective to a fairy tale is what this writing prompt is all about.  Jennifer writes:

“Tell the tale from another point of view – the one that seems to speak to you most pointedly or the one to which you have the most aversion.  It is not necessary to tell it from the perspective of the hero or heroine – even the pumpkin and the glass slipper in “Cinderella” have something surprising and unpredictable to say. If you are a woman, tell the tale as if you are Hansel lost with your sister Gretel in the woods; if you are a man, take Gretel’s point of view. Tell the tale as if you are the step-mother in Snow White, or are Bluebeard, or Rumpelstiltskin, or the king who wants gold spun from straw, the prince coming through the brambles to awaken Sleeping Beauty, or the Giant’s wife in “Jack and the Beanstalk.”

So without giving away the story, I can tell you that I am writing about Rapunzel.  Something in her tower is telling the story!

If you have time to try this out, the prompt is due today.  You can find the info here.

Creating, creating, capturing and creating!

I’m addicted to taking pictures and creating art with them on PicMonkey.  PicMonkey is free right now, so I am busy taking advantage of this service while it lasts.  I am considering paying for it once the free time is up, however, now my soul is busting with the urge to create create create.. so I am capturing close up, the world around me, and creating works of art.

I have a project I am working on for my photographs … So stay tuned! There is an Etsy shop in my future!

My happy happy loving Computer (laptop) 

Many of you know I have had tons of hiccups with my computer since last summer.  Some things seemed to have fixed themselves (God intervention I am sure).  Also this winter my friend Daniel was kind enough to send me a new power cord, since my other burned out literally, and my battery is totally drained.  Now, my connections USB, power, etc.. are starting to short out too, so I am looking for MORE divine intervention.  I love my Laptop and we really need it here for work and school!

This is my wacky Wednesday writing, hope you have an amazing day!

Tomorrow I will have an interview with Sarah Elle Elm, author of the new book Prismatic.


A Different Image – A New Perspective

Originally posted on April 26th 2011

Astronomers always work in the past; because light takes time to move from one place to another, they see things as they were, not as they are. ~Neale E. Howard, The Telescope Handbook and Star Atlas, 1967

I was having a conversation on Twitter with Jennifer Shelton this morning, about my 12-year-old son being disappointed when he found out he was not a water sign. She is doing a series this week:  Fire, Earth, Air & Water? Which element/s are you? As my son and I were reading her post, he sat there in disbelief when he found out he was an air sign. You see, ever since my son was born, he has been obsessed by everything water. He swam for the first time at 7 months while just holding my fingers, he had a huge fascination with Mermaids and their myths (and not just Ariel) thus; he would fly toilet paper around the house delightfully yelling, “Look at my Mermaid Fish”. Even today, he loves his baths, and spends the summer in the pool or in the lake. Wil tells me often “Mom, I love water, it makes me feel free… when am I going to get to see the ocean?”

Last year, when Wil began tampering with astrology he started asking questions about his sign (Aquarius) he, because of the “aqua” in Aquarius, thought he was a water sign. We never really looked up the element so assumptions we made… until yesterday.

What I am conveying here is, sometimes,  we go through life thinking we are something when really something completely different, it is all in how the EGO perceives things.  This does not have to be negative, au contraire; it really is a positive if you look at it on a perspective of discovery. Jennifer stated to me this morning during a twitter conversation:

He very well could have a moon or rising sign in water, or his sun could be in Aquarius but in a house ruled by water (4, 8, 12)

Which is most likely the truth, thus his love for water..

…. today he can start looking at himself on another angle… by uncovering the traits of the Element of Air and combining them with his love for water.

Air signs, according to Jennifer’s post, do not like exercise, they are the intellectuals of the Zodiac, are excellent researchers and good communicators. Thus, my son can have a field day discovering all these new traits (which he already has) by developing them in a completely new way.

Maybe one day, you will find him in the deep blue sea researching marine life, and communicating his findings in a HUGE way…

A mom can always dream right, but most important, I encourage my son to dream for himself 🙂

So… what sides of yourself have you not yet harnessed?

Not only in an astrological way, but also in a spiritual sense?

Guaranteed Success – FemCentral Writing Prompt

I often take part in Jennifer L. Shelton’s writing prompts.  Once a month FemCentral gives us a topic to write about which brings up many thought-provoking ideas, and helps us dig deep into our subconscious lighting up things hidden deep inside and putting them out into the Universe.

Jennifer, often writes about, “what we resist persists” and I agree.  I have discovered, while writing these prompts, I  often discover deep hidden secrets, or bring up things from my inner self, that I would never thought to write about.  Once out there, I either release and forgive these emotions and images, OR I begin to create and build on what I wrote.

This week, Jennifer posted a poem I wrote for this month’s prompt, and I am so pleased with it I want to share it here on my blog.  This particular poem is one I want to build on in my life, and begin experiencing the things my heart has always desired.


If I Could Prevail


If I could not fail,

I would set sail,

Across the ocean floor.

I would ride on a shark,

In the areas so dark,

and frantically start to explore.

If success was guaranteed,

I would plant a huge seed,

In the desert so arid and dry,

Then I would call on the rains,

To sprinkle my grains,

And plants would grow to the sky.

If I could not flounder;

I would become the founder;

of the biggest art school on this earth,

I would gather supplies,

Piled high to the skies,

and everyone’s art would give birth!

If prevailing was sure,

I would search for the cure

For every disease known “man” (and woman)

I would gather my findings,

and cut through the grindings,

As healing everyone is the plan.

If I could not fail,

I wouldn’t end this tale,

I would continue in order to inspire.

I would keep living this life,

and ending the strife

and set everyone’s muse on fire!


A house is a home: Where the Spirit Lies.

Many of you are familiar with Jennifer Shelton. She’s the awesome woman behind all the fabulous stuff over at FemCentral The Virtual Institute for Women.  She works as an editor, writer, and webmaster. She is an astrologer and teaches undergraduate, online classes in global cultures for Franklin University. Jennifer is  also a freelance writer and a mom,  and is currently working on a book about Suffragist Lucy Burns.

Jennifer came to me a couple of weeks ago with succinct dreams about “houses”.  Recurring dreams happen often when we really need to pay attention to something really important.  Dreammoods.com state:

“Recurring dreams are quite common and are often triggered by a certain life situation, transitional phase in life or a problem that keeps coming back again and again. These dreams may recur daily, once a week, or once a month. Whatever the frequency, there is little variation in the dream content itself.”

“The frequent repetition of such dreams forces you to pay attention and confront the dream. It is desperately trying to tell you something.  Such dreams are often nightmarish or frightening in their content, which also helps you to take notice and pay attention to them.”

Jennifer noted, that in most of the following dreams, she felt “panicky”.  Obviously, her dreams are really asking her to pay attention.  As you will see below.

The Dreams:

Dream 1:

My son  and I were out and about, and we run into my friend. He goes home with her to play with her kids, and I return to my house. After a while, I realize that I don’t know when or where to pick up my son and that I don’t have my friend’s phone number. I start to panic a little, when she pulls into my driveway with him. She said she wanted to see my house. Then, we both notice that down at the far corner of my land (I have an acre), people have set up chairs and decorations for a party. I am LIVID. No one asked me about it, although, if they had, I wouldn’t have minded. I run down to the corner and start dismantling all the stuff. I see a bunch of bottle rockets laid out and pick them up and break them. One neighbor sees me and gets mad.

Dream 2:

My son  is over at a friend’s house playing. We have just moved into a much smaller place, not much bigger than a camper. I miss our old house. The mother of my son’s  friend has told me that her family is moving, and she offers to give me some of her old furniture. I realize that I don’t know what time to pick my son up from his “play date.” About that time, he comes home.

Dream 3:

I wander into the “wing” of my house that I always forget about (there is no “wing” in real life). I see that it’s been decorated and furnished. The guy who did all this work on my house is still there. I thank him for everything and say that maybe I’ll spend more time in that area now. And, I ask why he’d spend so much money on a house he doesn’t own. He replies, “oh, now that I’ve spent all this money on your house, I’ll be suing you to get ownership.”

Dream 4:

I look out the front door and see a saber tooth tiger sitting in the street. It looks cartoonish, like the one on Ice Age. I open the door and quickly get all my cats to come in the house. A strange cat comes in with them. And, I also see two baby, black bears. I pick them up and notice how soft and cuddly they are. I bring them in the house and try to figure out what to do with them. While deciding, they burrow under some clothes on my floor. Very playful. I figure I will have to call Animal Services for help. Then, I look out my front door, and a very large bear is looking in. I assume it’s the cubs’ mother. But, the tiger is right behind her, and they start to fight. Next thing I know, my door is partly open, and the tiger is partly in my house. I get behind the door and with much physical effort, get it to shut. I relock and bolt it. But, that doesn’t work! The weight of the bear and tiger keep making the door open. So, I get furniture and place it on front the door. Dream ends.

The Interpretation

In dream 1 and 2. I feel it is safe to say that your son represents your “inner child” or “new project” which is your pride and joy!  In both dreams, you seem to panic over the fact that you have maybe neglected some aspect of your “inner child” or “project” and this scares you.  

You allow your son to leave and play, which leads me to believe that you trust this project or your inner child, and yet you are “panicky” because you feel you do not know how or where to pick him up?  Do you feel, in your life now, that something has been “left out” which you feel needs tending to?  (money, job out of the house)

In dream 1, your friend, asks to see your house.  In all these dreams, I am sure your house represents safety, comfort and security.. but it also goes deeper that.

Your neighbors come and think they can have a “party” on your lawn without your permission.. Who are they to tramp all over your “property”.. and come without being invited.  I guess this relates to what you were saying in the group, where neighbors and friends do not think it is “wise” to think you can make money solely on FemCentral

Now that I think about it.. Femcentral being your brainchild.. your son you must provide for .. it makes much sense your son represents this.. It is clear to me now.

I think your friend represents the curiosity side you have about you.  You are curious to go deeper into your house (which represent your basic needs and security) Could also be the curiosity to dig deeper into your “house” of spirit. (faith)

Those bottle rockets you crash.. you are livid that some people are treading on personal space.  I think you are releasing negative energy in your dreams.  It is that simple. Plus, I feel that if people would kindly ask you about his “project” you would be really happy to talk about it.

The neighbor being angry may represent those who do not believe in what you are doing.. or that side of you (EGO) that needs busting!

Dream 2

You move into a smaller house.. feeling constrained I am sure.  Do you feel undervalued in some way?  The fact that your son is out again, leads me to believe the same thing is happening here that you were experiencing in dream 1, but this time he returns on his own. A few minutes of faith, and you would have been blown away!  Because your son will always return.

You miss your comfort and sanctuary, which makes sense to me more now that you explained this in our conversation.  What can you do now in your life to bring back that sense of security?

Dream 3

Renovated room.  There is a room in you, some part of you that maybe you “forgot about”  (I think this room represents a part of you spirit) that was improved and decorated.. and you are willing to spend more time there now that you have discovered its beauty.. (was it an ugly place before?)  What does it represent to you?  

A male did this work for you (male side?) and now he wants to take it away?  AHA! I just got it.. you the yang.. Built this room, and you the yang, wants to “OWN” it!! Get it!! OWN Femcentral.. OWN that this is your life purpose.. OWN IT!! OWN IT OWN IT!! It is not a negative thing, its something you choose to accept now.  And the book research too!

The wing may also represent the need for a wider perspective.

Dream 4

Dream 4 was a bit more tricky because there are many animals in there. So I did a bit of research.

Cats:Cats in dreams represent feminine power. Cats also deal with esoteric knowledge, and spiritual guardianship. White cats represent hightened spiritual awareness. Black cats signify hidden secrets or hidden powers within the dreamer. Wild cats encourage us to exercise our will power more. Tame cats indicate a place of comfort in our lives. See Cat (domestic) symbolism here.
Bears:Bears are symbols of calm, stoic strength. Bears also indicate a time of introspection. If you are dreaming of a bear sleeping or hibernating, this is a message to do a little soul searching before you present an idea to the world. If a bear is chasing you, this means you are avoiding a big issue in your life, and it is time to deal with it. If the bear is standing up, this is a sign you need to defend your beliefs. More bear symbolism here.

I see the saber toothed tiger as a wildcat and tiger. The tiger represents feminine power.   It is, according to Avia’s site, a solar animal representing sun, summer and fire.  God of Wealth and safekeeper.

So why is the Mama Bear fighting with the saber tooth?  Defending your rights against the God of wealth?

Are they there to protect or take away your feminine power?  This I think you should look more into with the information I have provided.  This part is up to you to figure out, we can discuss.

Jen’s Response

For  the bear versus Tiger – I’m scared that following my dream/intuition will hurt my son  in some way. You know, it’s all well and good to risk my personal economic livelihood but I have my child  to take care of too!  Or thinking that i can’t possibly make enough money to survive without a “real” job?  Thank you so much. The interpretations were brilliant as always!

Do you have a recurring dream you want to share?  Post it below in the comment section.  For more info about me and how you can receive a dream interpretation from me click here and here.  Thank you! 



Going Back to Move Forward

Less than two days left in this old year! Astrologically speaking, that is. On Tuesday, March 20, at 1:14 am EST, the Sun moves into Aries, starting a brand new Zodiac year. This also marks the Vernal Equinox and the beginning of spring in the Northern Hemisphere.  

~Jennifer Shelton FemCentral

In her post today, My year in review and why you should do it too,  Jennifer Shelton writes about the importance of this review.  She states:  ” its  another way to be mindfully aware of what we are doing, so that we are not “sleep walking” through life. Major changes can result with little effort, if we bring awareness to our actions and choices.”

So, in the spirit of being mindful, and wanting to really SEE how far I have come in the past year, here is my review!
In this post, I am already questioning my love for teaching.  Back then, I suspected I was overwhelmed, and probably already suffering from depression.  Feeling overwhelmed I write:
Now I am at a crossroads. I need to bring income into my home, I need to work, however, I do not have the stamina to get into a room of 27 students and babysit them all day. Children today are not the same with subs, and even worse with subs who are not feeling well. They sense it!! and they kill me!!
I can see now, from this blog post, I am starting to see a transformation coming on.  I feel, when I reread this post, that I was preparing myself for TODAY.  In an excerpt I state:
Embarking on a new adventure is always scary. I can stay in the same old rut because it seems to feel safe, however; a rut is not comforting at all! Soon becomes so stale it stinks and I want to be free, which, in turn, begins to cause me great anxiety.

Here I am on an emotional roller coaster.  I feel its time to change my life around, yet, looking back, I was too scared  to do so.  I write:

For some sadness is pain, but to me there is something bigger hiding inside. You know the hurt you feel in your chest? I have to feel it and ride it out, because these past couple of years I’ve been trying to suppress that pain, which in turn has causes me grief. I get panic, anxiety, digestion problems…etc.. All that craziness for blocking the true feelings that live within my soul. 

A turning point!  I find myself searching for this light, that I KNOW is there!  After this post, many of the truths I needed to tell myself came up!  I decided it was time to change my life and jump!

Therefore, this is where I’m at. I’m at the point of renewal. I’ve seen this in my horoscope, on friends FB pages, on twitter.. The message is loud and clear! It is that time for me again. Time to shed my snake skin.

THIS!! Is where I totally started to break free!  After receiving a Tarot Reading from my friend  Sylvia van Bruggen she wrote an intuitive short story for me.  This story resonated with me in more ways than you can imagine. I decided to shed my relationship, this, was a HUGE step for me.  I even had an AHA moment recently.  Here is an excerpt:

….She enjoyed life so much, she played with the birds, danced with the butterflies and giggled at the rabbits as they raced ahead of her on the path. Then she found some stones along her path, and without realizing why, she put those stones in her back pack. Before long the back pack became so heavy her shoulders began to ache and she no longer saw the rabbits, the birds and the butterflies. All she knew was that she had to walk on, with her heavy bag…

August 2011:  Lily Pad

In August of 2011, my dream interpretations started going live!  My first post was Zakaphorian Dreams.  I was also desperately looking for a new place to live with my children.  So much happened that month, good and challenging.  Here is a quote from Maya Angelou which I attached to the poem I wrote.  I wanted to go home.

The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned. 
Maya Angelou

As my depression grew deeper and deeper, I was constantly trying to find ways to boost my self-esteem.  I truly believe in what I wrote in this post, however, it was a time of great reflection. No excerpts needed, feel free to check out the post.

This post came after being unplugged for 21 days.  The kids and I had moved into our NEW apartment, our home, in the beginning of the month.  This is when everything HIT me and I was truly exhausted.  I write:

When the time came to move out of my life and into this new one.  I was so excited.  I was counting down the days to freedom, and boy oh boy I couldn’t wait!  I would finally be free!! … I had no clue what I was going to face once in my new place, yet I was so sure it would be much better than where I was..  Yet, to my surprise I was faced with something even more scary:  Myself!!!

Nov. 2011:  Getting Naked

In November, I am really feeling it!  I’m lost, I’m afraid, and I have no clue what is going on with my life.  Work is killing me, I am crying every day.  This is the month I walk into a clinic and get help! HELP ME!! So grateful I did, because now I have an amazing therapist who really “gets me”!

It’s not easy to speak the truth.  When you are having a very bad day and someone, an acquaintance, asks:  “Hey, how are you doing?” Your first instinct would be to reply “Fine thanks. You?”  At that moment your mind starts to think for itself.  “You are not fine, darn it, you feel like crap!”  Why do we ever speak the truth when someone asks “Are you ok?”  Instead of replying fine, why don’t we say “Hey, NO, I’m not ok, I feel like shit and I want to crawl under a rock”?  Wouldn’t that be more authentic?

Dec. 2011:  Autentica

December!! Oh great December!  I remember this time, trying to keep face to have a happy Christmas with the children.  The worry, the anxiety, yet finding joy in decorations and baking.  I also decided to stop working, and to take care of ME!

As 2011 ends and 2012 begins… The passage will not be felt, but the continuous movement towards my wise self will followed by light, forwarded by love and entered with faith so strong nothing will stop who I have become.

This post came out for many reasons.  First, I started feeling “judged” for having clinical depression.  Plus, the Bell Canada Let’s Talk campaign was advertizing for Feb 8th, where people around Canada were going to openly talk about depression.  This is one of my most popular posts!

I am writing this post today because I think the world needs a crash course in depression. It affects many of us, men, women, children and teens.. yet I feel there is still a stigma attached to it. Those who have never experienced depression, cannot understand the challenges our minds and bodies experience.

Feb. 2012:  February a Time for Love – Self-Love

I truly believe this is the month I WOKE UP!! A slow wake up, however, I truly discovered and melted into who I really am.. and it was the beginning of the love story between me and me!

…I will sing myself a love song, write myself a love letter and maybe even share some of this new-found love with my children and all of you.. Actually I know I will share all this love I have inside.. because it is there.. waiting to be shared.. but first I need to stash away just a little for me…

Doing this review, allowed me to see how far I have come in the past year.  What I have accomplished is amazing.  The most important thing about this year is staying TRUE to who I am, and not letting others dictate to me what I should or should not do.. most importantly, not letting others DEFINE who I am.  


When carrying your shoes starts to make sense

Many of you know Jennifer Shelton, she’s the awesome woman behind all the fabulous stuff over at FemCentral The Virtual Institute for Women.  For those who do not, clic over to her site, I guarantee she will rock your socks off!



This is her latest dream!  

I was napping in a used bookstore, when a famous author came in. An African-American man whose name I recognized but could not place what he’d written. I went in the bookstore bathroom, which was also a pharmacy (?) and noticed were sanitary napkins stuffed in a hole in the baseboard. Ending up driving a friend to a nearby town, so she could use a cheap pharmacy to get a prescription, and on the way back, my car was on the interstate, and I followed along beside of it, in the grass, carrying my shoes. I’d put down my shoes, run to see where the car was, and then, go back and get my shoes. Somehow I kept up with the car but at the end, in order to get back in the car (it was running off the road), I lost track of my shoes. I was quite upset. Then, I passed some people with Soviet flags and was upset that I’d forgotten how to speak Russian

The Interpretation

Its seems to me, that much of this dream has to do with your project(S).  Not only your book, but your site as well. (but also there may be a glimpse of your personal life going on here too). Since we’ve spoken I also see your dream has brought up your past education.  I suspect your were afraid you have forgotten what you have learned in order to use it now, however, you are coming to realise that what you have learned and experienced in the past is working for you now.

There is some angst and frustration though.  Forgetting your shoes, which are in your waking life necessary and valuable.. But I think the shoes represent your education: To you shoes mean something that is necessary, protective, comforting and practical, useful.. They are “valuable” to you. Without shoes she would be lost!!!  If I were to describe my education, I would use those words, and you also used “a necessary investment and expensive”!!! So is an education.  What this tells me is that you value your education and you want to start using it to your advantage.  Leaving your shoes behind was a HUGE frustration for you, so I am thinking… Maybe you do not believe that all these projects reflect your education and feel that maybe others would be disappointed like:  “Crap.. She got all this education and she is doing all this hocus pocus stuff! And trying to be a writer.. Who is she kidding?”  (Not that I believe that at all!  And I am just putting it out there!! Or maybe you are unconsciously saying this to yourself?)  Also.. The leaving behind part also reminds me of how you left a website or something like that behind last week?

You mentioned Martin Luther King when we spoke about the African-American Author.  MLK was an activist, you are an activist, to me he reflects what you are doing for women.. So it makes sense that he is walking in the used bookstore.. This used bookstore is a place to find old books that have already been written.  To me this represents what has already been written in you… What you already KNOW!! Which ties into the above (your knowledge is golden).  BTW you probably know this already but he is a Capricorn.. Interesting.

The bathroom with the tampons in the holes of the baseboard.  I see the tampons as FEMININE protection!  You are the voice of the female species right!  So these tampons were put in the holes to protect for something (but I am not sure what).  Where do those holes lead to? Is my question. Could someone be peeking in if those tampons weren’t there to protect?

The pharmacy:  A pharmacy is a place where we get things to heal ourselves physically.  First I see protection (tampons) then I see healing (pharmacy).  There must be something that needs healing within you.. Something you had to get your other self too (that friend).  She needs a cheap pharmacy to boot!! Healing that is inexpensive.  Who is this friend? Describe her to yourself.. What part of you does she represent?

The car:  At first you are in the car, in control, driving your friend… then suddenly you are on the interstate:  Busy busy and chaotic!  So you choose to walk in the nice soft grass beside your car.  Is this the safe route?  Or is this a good a comfortable route for you to take?  Both of these are good… If you need the comfy route in the grass in your life.. This is ok!!

The car, is related to you going back and forth for the shoes.  This is the part I find a bit more challenging to interpret.  If the shoes are reflect your education, protection and necessity.. The car is also that for you.  Yet, at one point the car is veering off the road and you have forsaken your shoes for the car?  What does that mean to you?  Has there been an exchange somewhere recently in your life, that you had to choose between 2 things that were important to you? Like as if you had to weigh the pro’s and con’s to decide?

The Russian tourists are strangers in your land and you are trying to communicate with them using something you have previously learned but temporarily forgotten…. I know you can probably tie this one in with the rest.

Jen’s Original Response: (uncensored)

“I don’t know that I’d connected all of this with my education but I do see that now. And, my website that I left behind was a more traditional site, that really highlighted my academic work. Ah, the tampons in the hole in the wall. The hole was already there, so whomever decided it would be useful to go ahead and use that space. Kind of like me starting FemCentral! I did it b/c there was a “hole” in my life. There were two other people in the dream (besides the African-American author) AND they were the two women who were laid off when I was. So, yep, there’s that connection too! My career transition is quite unexpected and my parents have frequently said, “I can’t believe you got this expensive education and you’re working as an astrologer.” Bingo

The art of interpreting dreams cannot be learnt from books. Methods and rules are good only when we can get along without them. Only the man who can do it anyway has real skill, only the man of understanding really understands.

“The Meaning of Psychology for Modern Man” (1933). In CW 10: Civilization in Transition. pg. 327

With love



Is Jaywalking bypassing your intuition?

Intuition is a spiritual faculty and does not explain, but simply points the way.  ~Florence Scovel Shinn

The other day I was buying something online for my daughter.  She really REALLY wanted this sweater and since she needs a new sweater I decided to get it for her.  We finally found the one she wanted, however, something in my stomach was telling me “mmm.. Check this out first” .  I ignored the feeling and proceeded to check out.  The order went through ok, however, the day after I realized I paid by echeck (which means the money comes directly out of your account not out of the Paypal acct) .  Thank God I did the double take and was able to transfer the PP money into my bank on time, because I would be in big trouble right now with everyone (bank, paypal and the vendor).

Last week I was watching OWN, and Oprah was doing an episode on  “Trusting Your Intuition”.  In September Jennifer Shelton from Femcentral posted “Whats a “gut” and how do I listen to it?”

It is no coincidence those things are coming to me when I am questioning my intuition.  I get mad at myself when I ignore it, and KNOW, just KNOW when I’m doing it.  When I experience my intuition,  I get a pinch inside my stomach (for when I “should” take another path). That pinch goes right to my brain and sends an alarm:  “NO NO NO – Stop – Double Check – Not Good!!”  When I am making the choice that is right for me, the feeling is totally different.

My question is:  If my gut is speaking to me, why do I choose to ignore it?   I can probably come up with all kinds of answers, however, the whys are not important.  What is important is that I see, hear and feel!   So, like an athlete, I am in training!  Lets move on to practice.

I created a system for myself to remind me of the “red flags”.  First, with my therapist, we decided that I should put Stop signs around my house to remind me, during my vulnerable stages, what is important:  ME!!  Moreover, I must remember to set boundaries and stick to them.  There will come a time, during this process, that I may become weak.  These stop signs will serve as reminders to not open the door to things that may, in the end, be a detriment to my healing.

Second,  while I was walking across the street here.  I noticed that often, I was jaywalking. So lets say “jaywalking” is ignoring my gut.   I also noticed that often, almost everyone around here jaywalks! (so everyone ignores their gut? No.. but for the purpose of this excercise YES!)   Jaywalking, in this instance, represents taking a chance every time one ignores the stop sign and crosses the street.  So this is my plan.  When I want to cross the street, I press on the little hand to activate the cross walk.  Although it takes a long time for the little walking man to show up, I wait until its safe.  Thus, the hand telling me to stop is my “gut instinct” to stop.  The little man telling me to walk “is my gut instinct to go with it”!

This visual exercise is really helping me tap into “the stop and go” of instinct.  It is also teaching me patience, and being good to myself.  I mean, if I cross that street too early, I could get hit by a car.  If I wait, I am making a wise choice.  I still look both ways before I cross, but know that the path is cleared and its my turn!

As for my daughter’s sweater, in  the end, the money cleared and there is no harm done… Yet I can’t wait to receive my daughter’s sweater to make this whole transaction A.. OK!!!

What signs do you look for?  What practices do you do in order to trust your gut?