Pragmatic or Care Free?

If you surrender to the wind, you can ride it.  ~Toni Morrison

I’ve been thinking outside myself a lot lately.  Not being able to settle down yet to meditate for long periods of time.  I do manage to journal short sentences, sit for tiny periods to breathe, and read a little.  I am looking for answers… I think I spend too much time looking for answers.  I do not know why I need to know everything at every moment.. this has been a struggle most of my life.. even as a child.

Around age 8, I once sat on an egg to see if it would hatch… I was so curious about how chickens form that the urge was too strong for me to resist.. Alas!! the egg broke on contact… Which leads to me ask:  “When I seek to know the answer right away.. does the egg break?”  I mean, even if I sat on that egg for days.. it would have never hatched right?  Yet, if I were a hen and that egg had been fertilized, then, eventually, I would have a chick.

So.. how does this apply in life?  Well I am not a hen.. I am human.. so maybe looking at things that are out of my control is not something I want to do. Obviously I cannot be what I am not.   What I want to do, is really trust what I already know and work with that.  I am on the verge of declaring to the world what I already know.. and admit this to myself.  I am on the verge of letting the hens lay eggs, and allowing myself to do what I want to do, what I am meant to do.. but I need a plan.

I am not much for planning.. for some silly reason.. Plans scare me.  Maybe because, many times in my life, things didn’t go according to plan… (very disappointing).  Yet I know, when I set goals, I can achieve them.. it HAS happened.

Surrender!  Surrender is one of the most challenging things one can do, but once one experiences surrender, the journey is much more enchanting.  So for today, I will surrender all my questions to the Universe, and devote my time to being ..  just be.. yet allow myself to set a few concrete goals and see where life takes me from there.

I guess it’s all a balance between being pragmatic and care free!  WOH!

Love and blessings


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