Flying Solo


Did I ever tell you I was broken?  Yep, I kept myself that way so you can love me.  I didn’t know any other way for you to even look at me.  So if I remained out-of-order, you would come to my rescue.  I was the bird with a broken wing.  Never really flying very far, like a fish in its fishbowl, I was comfortable in my surroundings.  I thought to myself, with my birdlike wisdom, my wing could never heal because if it healed, that meant I had to fly on my own.

Flying on my own!! That is the scariest thing imaginable.  I would have to jump off a branch and trust that the wind would take me and my wings would work.  Flapping them, would mean trusting myself that I can do it.. and the last time I did, I fell, and broke my beak.  Things went downhill from there.

Then one day, while watching all my bird friends, fly around.  I was getting quite jealous just sitting out on my perch.  I was observing how much fun they were having, and how many worms they were catching.  Obviously it was challenging for me with my  sore wing to get worms so early.  I was hungry, I was lonely and I decided I was worthless.

You haven’t seen a tree until you’ve seen its shadow from the sky.  ~Amelia Earhart

The other birds felt bad, and sometimes they would come and share their bounty with me, yet, a few birds, the ones that hang out on the wire would sing behind my back.  They often had weddings there, and I was never invited.  I heard them talk about me saying how lazy I was, that if I just worked harder at fixing myself I could have a better life.  This is when I started believing I needed to be put back together.  However, who would do that?

I also had my friends, the blue birds, they would always cheer me on and tell me that everything is going to be alright.  They complemented me on my style, and how they loved the single purple feather which lined my wings.  They told me to believe in myself, that sooner or later I would fly just like them.

As much as they loved me, I often never received their love with open arms.  I thought it would be easier to lay low in my nest, hoping for a visit once and awhile.

K. Shreesh Then one day, my wing hurt so bad, I went to scoop up a juicy worm,  and I fell 10 feet below heading towards my death.  I couldn’t get the nerve to flap my wings, and started to let myself fall.  Then, low  and behold a raven swooped by and picked me up.  He told me he saw me falling from miles away and couldn’t let such a beautiful bird die.  That’s when I turned to him and said:  Can you help me?  Can you teach me how to fly like you do?

He complied right away, and we started flying lessons the next day.  As the days grew longer and the nights grew warmer, I felt my strength come back.  I felt like a hawk!  Ready to face the air!  Ready to swoop over huge mountains.

The birds around me started flocking my way.  I finally was invited on the electrical wire to the morning dove’s wedding.  How wonderful.

Then it hit me, I was never EVER broken.. I was always whole.  I just needed to listen to myself, to my teachers, and to my birdly instincts all along.  And KNOW that the Universe is always there, guiding me and supporting me every single beat of my wings!

I can fly
I can fly
I can fly

Face Above – Workin’ on trust


Only as high as I reach can I grow,
Only as far as I seek can I go,
Only as deep as I look can I see,
Only as much as I dream can I be.
~Karen Ravn

This past week or so, my fascination for dreams and what lies in them, has grown even deeper.   Every time someone surrenders a dream to me, I am amazed and perplexed at the mysteries that lie within.

For the past few days I’ve posted consecutive dreams my good friend Mel has experienced over a two-week period.  These dreams came to her after much self-work and questioning.  You can read more about Mel here, and find dream 1, dream 2, and dream 3.

This final dream, is a short one, but the message is powerful.  In the end, it’s all about trust!   I want to give Mel a big thanks and a hug for letting me do this! 

 

The Dream

Last night’s started with me and my closest Aunty in a car together that I was driving. I said to her: ‘Did you lock up the flat on your way out?’ She said: ‘Well not lock it, I just let the door shut on its own. It locks automatically doesn’t it.’ I stopped the car. I was shocked. I felt panic. I said: ‘No. I need to go back and make sure the door is firmly locked. I know you’re right and it will more than likely be alright but just in case. I will pull into the main car park for visitors as it’s the quickest way to get up there as soon as possible. You will need to watch the car for me.’ She agreed although I was slightly panicked as my aunt cannot drive and so she wouldn’t be able to move the car if someone checked and realised I was parked in the carpark where I shouldn’t be. I went into the building which is like one of those baroque italian buildings with a concierge at the desk etc. I get the feeling I was in Italy. I started to rush up the stairs but realised I needed to go up seven flights of stairs and I was quite tired already so I pushed the button for the lift on the second floor even though the lift was quite slow. It finally came and I jumped in and got to my floor. I did discover the door to my flat was unlocked but when I checked nobody had been inside. I locked the door and felt better that I had stopped and checked for myself.

 

The Interpretation

Since you are driving the car Mel, it tells me that you are capable and working on navigating from one stage to another in your personal growth. Which is what you are doing in your life now. Your aunty represents the parts of you who IS strong, determined, family oriented and loyal. This is the second time loyalty comes into play, so being loyal to yourself is important. Especially these times when you feel you have trouble fitting in to your environment. Stay true to who you are!

You seem to not totally trust that part of yourself that is your aunty. You had to go back up and check the apt, when in fact, she felt all would be ok. When you did double-check (which took time and effort although you avoided the long hard way up Thank God) you saw that all was well. (like worrying for nothing which we all do at times)

The fact that you left her in the parked car a bit worried, leads me to believe that you seem to resist accepting to relax and just be and have fun. Go go have fun and do something for yourself. It’s so important.

 

Mel’s Response

I had to sit with this for the day and think about it. You are right about the trust part of things. I always doubt myself all the time! There are two sides of me. There is the part of me who is quite slapdash and forgetful and very much of MY family. The part that leaves the door unlocked and there is the careful, sensible part of me which fits in with me since I’ve left home. The part that I WANT to be ALWAYS. Does this make sense with your interp do you think. I think it adds another level on what you told me. This ties in again though with the part which doesn’t know how to relax and have fun. As you know I’m often not doing stuff but it’s not relaxing. I am still worrying about the stuff I ‘should’ be doing and not really having fun. I’ve practised doing stuff when and if I want, rather than doing stuff because I feel I have to and it’s really not easy. I don’t want to move from a place in myself of fear any more but from a place of love.

How do you think this fits in with your interp? I think it fits in rather well. Kind of like putting another sheet of acetate over a page with more information on it.

Mel

This journey of self-love for Mel and all of us, is a journey of a lifetime.  The dreams were only a small part of this journey, however, our dreams do act as a compass and give us insight to what lies beyond our waking lives.  Our dreams CAN and if you let them guide you, WILL take your hand a bring you to awareness. 

This is not the end for Mel, its just the beginning!

Love and Light